Saturday, June 20, 2009
Stunna Shades
Now, if you aren't wearing Oakley shades, you might as well be retarded.
I'll be walking up the bank and be all "Oh shit, there's a nice fuckin trout."
People with me will squint, use their hands to block sunlight at all inflicting angles, or even abandon all senses and flat out lie,
"Oh, yeeaah. Right there." (Points at the water.)
Yeah right. Yeah fucking right. Fuckin fish isn't anywhere near where you pointed.
"You see him, huh?" - That dude don't see shit!
"Yeah I thought I saw something, but maybe not." -> Try these shades pimpin.
I say, fuck trying to see it, just see it. Oakley has the shit that is straight up gin clear polarized creek and flats pimpin shit. You see all the detail, all the time. Just how we need it.
I mean damn, look on the cover of Fly Fisherman. Wear shades like that and catch fish that big and be on the cover of Fly Fisherman, bitch.
I'll be walking up the bank and be all "Oh shit, there's a nice fuckin trout."
People with me will squint, use their hands to block sunlight at all inflicting angles, or even abandon all senses and flat out lie,
"Oh, yeeaah. Right there." (Points at the water.)
Yeah right. Yeah fucking right. Fuckin fish isn't anywhere near where you pointed.
"You see him, huh?" - That dude don't see shit!
"Yeah I thought I saw something, but maybe not." -> Try these shades pimpin.
I say, fuck trying to see it, just see it. Oakley has the shit that is straight up gin clear polarized creek and flats pimpin shit. You see all the detail, all the time. Just how we need it.
I mean damn, look on the cover of Fly Fisherman. Wear shades like that and catch fish that big and be on the cover of Fly Fisherman, bitch.
Friday, June 19, 2009
What happened....
Saturday was two Gary's (word stolen from KP) from downtown San Francisco, who could not grasp the idea of a drag-free dead-drift, instead implementing a Northwestern swung fly technique only to catch pike minnow after pike minnow. Great. Yet on the drifts where the fly actually got deep enough, trout were connected. Amazing.
Sunday was a good day with 2 dudes who could fish. Unfortunately one guy had a gimpy knee and had to cut out early, but not until he snapped photos of a 20" brown I patiently and skillfully coached his buddy into. Fucking sweet. We got a handful of rainbows too. Can you say tippity tip?
Then I heard a really interesting thing. A few days ago, a dude asked if you need a license to fly fish.
"Hmmmm," I thought, "This guy cannot be serious...?" This would be a good time to use Red Foreman's my foot in your ass signature line....
"Yeah you actually DO need a license to fly fish, and they are $50, cash." Is what I wanted to say, however, I didn't say anything and just let the other dudes do the explaining.
Also caught an 8" striper that nearly pulled the rod out of my hand. Ok maybe not, but it was a striper. That counts, right?
Sunday was a good day with 2 dudes who could fish. Unfortunately one guy had a gimpy knee and had to cut out early, but not until he snapped photos of a 20" brown I patiently and skillfully coached his buddy into. Fucking sweet. We got a handful of rainbows too. Can you say tippity tip?
Then I heard a really interesting thing. A few days ago, a dude asked if you need a license to fly fish.
"Hmmmm," I thought, "This guy cannot be serious...?" This would be a good time to use Red Foreman's my foot in your ass signature line....
"Yeah you actually DO need a license to fly fish, and they are $50, cash." Is what I wanted to say, however, I didn't say anything and just let the other dudes do the explaining.
Also caught an 8" striper that nearly pulled the rod out of my hand. Ok maybe not, but it was a striper. That counts, right?
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Friday, May 29, 2009
Don't miss the Black Ant Hatch!
Because the Black Ant Hatch is only going on for a few more weeks, according to one source......Make sure you have many sizes, shapes, and shades of black for this particular insect, across all lifestages - nymph, pupa, emerger, cripple, adult, because you know, the fucking black ants are so anatomically diverse and shit.
Make sure to use the term Black Ant Hatch - people will know you that you know your shit when you use this term. And when speaking intelligently about this rare yet prolific "hatch", don't you fucking throw them sunburned Red Ant cousins in there. Fuck the red ant hatch its all about the Black Ant Hatch. I don't want to see you stepping up to the creek with a half red, half black mutant motherfucking ant pattern either. Use a sharpie, Einstein.
Black Ant Hatch. I didn't realize that ants hatch. I guess there's more than them just popping outta eggs and crawling all over me when I'm sitting on the bank trying to get the damn top off my klean kanteen. But the last time I checked, ants are a fucking terrestrial insect. So there's really no hatch at all............
Make sure to use the term Black Ant Hatch - people will know you that you know your shit when you use this term. And when speaking intelligently about this rare yet prolific "hatch", don't you fucking throw them sunburned Red Ant cousins in there. Fuck the red ant hatch its all about the Black Ant Hatch. I don't want to see you stepping up to the creek with a half red, half black mutant motherfucking ant pattern either. Use a sharpie, Einstein.
Black Ant Hatch. I didn't realize that ants hatch. I guess there's more than them just popping outta eggs and crawling all over me when I'm sitting on the bank trying to get the damn top off my klean kanteen. But the last time I checked, ants are a fucking terrestrial insect. So there's really no hatch at all............
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
fishing (fish'ing)
1. n. the art of casting, trolling, jigging, or spinning while freezing, sweating, swatting, or swearing.
- Ken's Sporting Goods
You can't really argue with that...
- Ken's Sporting Goods
You can't really argue with that...
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Creek Walk
Whatchu know about da creek walk, boi!!!!!!!
U don't know nuthin' bout the those boys on the water that talk the talk and walk da walk, creeking walkin and and creek hoppin all up in your face! Doin it derrty with the gangster fishing boogie...
get ur creek walk on, homie ->
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Friday @ Boreal
The last day for the college student special. Hopefully my ID will work next year and I can scam them for running such a horrible last part of the season, bastards. Wednesday will probably be my last ride day and then fishing and frolicking ensues until the snow dumps again. Maybe by then I will have a rig to mob it through the chains only BS.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
My B Day
Consumers are often faced with a dilemma of what is a quality ironing board...?
A good one is one you can close with one hand.
From my perspective, the better quality ironing boards (and irons in most cases) are ones that are built to last. You will see old school 1950's steam irons that press clothes like champs.
A good one is one you can close with one hand.
From my perspective, the better quality ironing boards (and irons in most cases) are ones that are built to last. You will see old school 1950's steam irons that press clothes like champs.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Tuesday
Rode hard at Shasta and got some kickers down pat...pretty soon I should be shredding at the professional level alongside Mr. Shaun White. Yeah right.
Then I fished the Upper Sac on the way home. Got one in about 15 mins, and feeling all cocky, decided to try to cross to fish a sick seam on the other side. Made it about halfway across before the current pushed my foot off the rock I "jumped" to. Swam for a few seconds and then realized,
"Aw shit, this is too deep! Nice work dumbass."
Was about 15 ft from a gnarly 250 yd long whitewater section (flowing 1750 cfs)and was able to pull away onto a boulder - with the help of 6 lb 8 oz newborn infant Jesus. Sat there for a sec, soaked to the bone, shaking my head in disbelief. I had to mob upstream a good 30 feet before attempting to get back or I would have died March 31, 2009.
Made it back with only losing a half eaten package of beef jerky and destroying my cell. Lesson learned: Don't be a dumbass.
Then I fished the Upper Sac on the way home. Got one in about 15 mins, and feeling all cocky, decided to try to cross to fish a sick seam on the other side. Made it about halfway across before the current pushed my foot off the rock I "jumped" to. Swam for a few seconds and then realized,
"Aw shit, this is too deep! Nice work dumbass."
Was about 15 ft from a gnarly 250 yd long whitewater section (flowing 1750 cfs)and was able to pull away onto a boulder - with the help of 6 lb 8 oz newborn infant Jesus. Sat there for a sec, soaked to the bone, shaking my head in disbelief. I had to mob upstream a good 30 feet before attempting to get back or I would have died March 31, 2009.
Made it back with only losing a half eaten package of beef jerky and destroying my cell. Lesson learned: Don't be a dumbass.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Spring Break Gig
I hauled ass down the 395 to Bridgeport last Monday morning and "discovered" the East Walker River. This place is the shit. Stayed in Mammoth Lakes w/ Josh Hevron, a guide for The Troutfitter in town. He showed me around town, Hot Creek, Upper and Lower Owens, and the East Walker.
I met all sorts of dudes on my trip, from the legendary E Walker gangster Scott Freeman, to a down-to-earth homie Steve who runs P3 in Mammoth Lakes. Thanks for the boots, Steve! Either way, these boys down here can fish and have a damn good time out on the water.
All in all, I fished everyday, snowboarded a few days, and ate the best food ever - courtesy of the Mammoth boys. I have never been so tired, yet so happy and content in my life. It was by far the best spring break ever, and I owe it all to my homie Josh. He is the man!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
'skins for dayz
I am set on lines for a while. Got all sorts of sharkskins to fuck around with, even nabbed a stillwater line as well. Now if only the days would wind faster so the stones will come out and I can throw my magnum taper on the Pit...Livin day by day is what it seems like right now.
My new thing is getting lines to fish, only to borrow rods from several friends that actually are nice enough to let me fuck with there $695 Scott rods. So I figured have a line and a reel and they won't be tripping about me and a whole set up. Thanks boys! I won't be a poor college kid forever!
My new thing is getting lines to fish, only to borrow rods from several friends that actually are nice enough to let me fuck with there $695 Scott rods. So I figured have a line and a reel and they won't be tripping about me and a whole set up. Thanks boys! I won't be a poor college kid forever!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
The USPS
I got a card returned to me in the mail today.Magenta had got my latest hair stylist a thank you card for cutting that mop - I so dearly loved - off my head. It made noise and shit. It was a nice card.
What was not nice is how when I went to get my mail, the fucking card was returned with a stamped message:
"RETURN TO SENDER FOR ADDITIONAL POSTAGE *HANDWRITTEN IN HERE: 37 CENTS* FOR UNMACHINABLE MAIL. "
Unmachinable mail. First of all, unmachineable is not a word. Lucky I am so bright and I understand idiot language since it must be dealt with on a near daily basis. Second, why the fuck, why in the FUCK, did someone take the time to stamp a stupid message and hand write 37 cents and then send that shit all the way back to my house? Because where the fucking card was going was 3 blocks from the P.O.
In the time it takes some retard to stamp that shit, weigh it and determine the cents amount, sign the 37 cents, put the envelope back in the mail sorter, have the sorter sort it and have the mailman bring that shit back, they could have just added a stamp and be done with it.
The USPS literally hustled me for 37 cents. They wanted an extra 37 cents to complete my transaction. What are you gonna buy with 37 cents? Candy? a doughnut? some shoe laces to floss your ass?
They need 37 extra cents to look at it and try to figure out where its going, rather than sending it thru a mail sorting machine. Funny thing is they looked at it, and decided, "Nope, no go, nigga we need 37 more cents for this shit."
37 cents is not the problem. My mail coming back after a sent it - to be delivered at a particular time so my hairdresser remembers who the fuck I am - is important. Now my hair stylist gets her card with a fucking stamped message on it. Wow, classy.
What was not nice is how when I went to get my mail, the fucking card was returned with a stamped message:
"RETURN TO SENDER FOR ADDITIONAL POSTAGE *HANDWRITTEN IN HERE: 37 CENTS* FOR UNMACHINABLE MAIL. "
Unmachinable mail. First of all, unmachineable is not a word. Lucky I am so bright and I understand idiot language since it must be dealt with on a near daily basis. Second, why the fuck, why in the FUCK, did someone take the time to stamp a stupid message and hand write 37 cents and then send that shit all the way back to my house? Because where the fucking card was going was 3 blocks from the P.O.
In the time it takes some retard to stamp that shit, weigh it and determine the cents amount, sign the 37 cents, put the envelope back in the mail sorter, have the sorter sort it and have the mailman bring that shit back, they could have just added a stamp and be done with it.
The USPS literally hustled me for 37 cents. They wanted an extra 37 cents to complete my transaction. What are you gonna buy with 37 cents? Candy? a doughnut? some shoe laces to floss your ass?
They need 37 extra cents to look at it and try to figure out where its going, rather than sending it thru a mail sorting machine. Funny thing is they looked at it, and decided, "Nope, no go, nigga we need 37 more cents for this shit."
37 cents is not the problem. My mail coming back after a sent it - to be delivered at a particular time so my hairdresser remembers who the fuck I am - is important. Now my hair stylist gets her card with a fucking stamped message on it. Wow, classy.
An Early Blog
Innovation is what drives creative marketing and project managerial minds. How to drop a creative product and do well in sales, in retail, e-business, and develop a group of evangelists who believe in that product, its performance in real-world applications, and the satisfaction level that the product has to an individual consumer.
It has been said that with good products or services that you are satisfied with, you will tell 4-6 people. If you are unhappy, or dissatisfied with a product or service, that same person is likely to tell 8-10 people.
Shit....when I am unhappy about a product I tell every person I know who would possibly use it or even think about using it. For example, Ray's Liquor. Fuck Ray's Liquor is all I have to say. The dudes that work there are fags, their customer service skills blows donkey cock, and their prices suck as well. Last summer they would not sell me beer because I needed 2 forms of ID...Are you fucking kidding me? Why is Ray's liquor so fucking special, that you need 2 fucking forms of ID, and what the fuck, when is a credit card an acceptable form of ID?
Its not issued by the government. It doesn't have your address. Or birth-date. Or eye color. It doesn't enable you to vote, drive a car, or join the fuckin' Marines. So why in Holy Hell does this motherfucker need to see my credit card when I have a perfectly legit, current, accurate Driver's License? Cash and a current DL ain't good enough for this east indian-arab-persian whatever he is.
So I left the the 30 pack on the counter, cursed at the fag behind the counter, got the 10 people I was going floating with, and left. They just lost biz from me and 10 of my friends that were there to buy something.
So what happens? I go to Safeway and buy the same 30 pack, for $4-5 cheaper, from the checker who has a nice conversation with me. From a place that accepts Driver's Licenses as an acceptable form of identification. Like it should be. Since they invented DL's for fuckin identification.
You can bet I told every single person I saw on the way down to Scotty's that Ray's Liquor sucks, don't go there, and fuck Ray's Liquor. I won't ever go back, which sucks for them, because I drink a lot.
Me drinking = business for Star Liquors and Safeway. Star Liquors has excellent customer service, really nice dudes, great selection and lowest prices in town. And its closer to my house.
It has been said that with good products or services that you are satisfied with, you will tell 4-6 people. If you are unhappy, or dissatisfied with a product or service, that same person is likely to tell 8-10 people.
Shit....when I am unhappy about a product I tell every person I know who would possibly use it or even think about using it. For example, Ray's Liquor. Fuck Ray's Liquor is all I have to say. The dudes that work there are fags, their customer service skills blows donkey cock, and their prices suck as well. Last summer they would not sell me beer because I needed 2 forms of ID...Are you fucking kidding me? Why is Ray's liquor so fucking special, that you need 2 fucking forms of ID, and what the fuck, when is a credit card an acceptable form of ID?
Its not issued by the government. It doesn't have your address. Or birth-date. Or eye color. It doesn't enable you to vote, drive a car, or join the fuckin' Marines. So why in Holy Hell does this motherfucker need to see my credit card when I have a perfectly legit, current, accurate Driver's License? Cash and a current DL ain't good enough for this east indian-arab-persian whatever he is.
So I left the the 30 pack on the counter, cursed at the fag behind the counter, got the 10 people I was going floating with, and left. They just lost biz from me and 10 of my friends that were there to buy something.
So what happens? I go to Safeway and buy the same 30 pack, for $4-5 cheaper, from the checker who has a nice conversation with me. From a place that accepts Driver's Licenses as an acceptable form of identification. Like it should be. Since they invented DL's for fuckin identification.
You can bet I told every single person I saw on the way down to Scotty's that Ray's Liquor sucks, don't go there, and fuck Ray's Liquor. I won't ever go back, which sucks for them, because I drink a lot.
Me drinking = business for Star Liquors and Safeway. Star Liquors has excellent customer service, really nice dudes, great selection and lowest prices in town. And its closer to my house.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
What is there to say?
Its fucking raining and that's what these sonsofbitches wanted. Now shit is borderline flooded and my feet are wet. Maybe a pair of shoes with a larger covered surface area would be a good idea...
Valentine's Day was the best I have ever had. Spent the day with my girl hanging out, drinking mimosas, eating salmon and cream cheese omelets for brunch, and dining on my personally wrapped sushi for dinner. Under the steady beats of reggae, sake, and chronic smoke.
We ate mostly sashimi, but I twisted up a few fatty rolls that turned out pretty good. I like nigiri the best, or at least some sushi rice with my sashimi.
Did I mention I have the hottest girlfriend ever? Grade A, certified dime ;-) She is certainly gorgeous!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
The rain has come
And guess what? Steels wanna eat now. Buddies are telling me it has been going down and now, right now, is the time to go. You wanna talk about timing? Timing a run or a good time to fish? This week is the time!
Monday, February 9, 2009
Rainy
Today was windy and began to drop water at 4 PM or so. Found some travel deals online and am looking to get in on a little spring fling - if you know what I'm saying.
Need some near gear to expand my horizon on the angle. Thinkin 2009 is time for more bass, maybe some carp, and a lot more fun. With the job market so bad, looks like I may be worrying about my problems bright and early every morning before the job hunt...On a pond throwing some freakish leech, senko posing concoction of bunny and 'bou.
I really like the Scott Warm Water rods. Man, those are some seriously fine pieces of graphite and cork. I can't bring myself to use a rod so damn sweet to fish for a savage green and black cannibalistic fucker that roams every water for miles.
Magnum taper. Think about this...Good shit.
Need some near gear to expand my horizon on the angle. Thinkin 2009 is time for more bass, maybe some carp, and a lot more fun. With the job market so bad, looks like I may be worrying about my problems bright and early every morning before the job hunt...On a pond throwing some freakish leech, senko posing concoction of bunny and 'bou.
I really like the Scott Warm Water rods. Man, those are some seriously fine pieces of graphite and cork. I can't bring myself to use a rod so damn sweet to fish for a savage green and black cannibalistic fucker that roams every water for miles.
Magnum taper. Think about this...Good shit.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
And we are off!
Class started 8 AM, a lovely intro to Spring 2009 semester at CSU, Chico with E-Marketing. One of the main points the professor stressed, is that since we are an elective class, he expects us to be fired up and ready to learn about this shit...
Well, its 8 AM, 35 degrees outside, and most of the class is still asleep. The only reason I was even remotely paying attention was some girl eye fucked the shit outta me and I was like whoa! Lookin' at me like I just got out of the shower and she wanted to come over and grab me by the wiener. What a sicko.
Now I'm wasting time before my next class, Geoscience 351, most likely the most gay class I will have this semester. God help me.
Well, its 8 AM, 35 degrees outside, and most of the class is still asleep. The only reason I was even remotely paying attention was some girl eye fucked the shit outta me and I was like whoa! Lookin' at me like I just got out of the shower and she wanted to come over and grab me by the wiener. What a sicko.
Now I'm wasting time before my next class, Geoscience 351, most likely the most gay class I will have this semester. God help me.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
End of Winter Break
Tomorrow is the official last day of my Winter break. It has been a great break for me and I have really enjoyed every minute of it.
I spent xmas with my family in Chico,
New Years w/ my Uncle's Family in Orange County,
met some guys from Mammoth and Colorado,
fished locally and not-so locally,
caught some nice fish,
rowed a drift boat, crashed a drift boat,
made my first appearance on the Trinity,
found some new waters to fish this year,
got laid countless times, brought my little girl Alani out for her first fishing trip,
hit the beaches of Fort Bragg and Huntington Beach,
trimmed my hair, got stuck in snow,
drove a Tundra pulling a 16" Clacka at 75 mph,
ate a bunch of really good food,
got a new cal king bed that is so comfy,
puked from drinking too much and eating a nasty burrito,
and worked the Scott Rods booth at the ISE Sac show.
It was quite an adventure. Drank and smoked a shit load and it was worth every minute that I wasn't sitting in class.
School starts for me on Tuesday. Lets hope for a strong semester and a good job!
I spent xmas with my family in Chico,
New Years w/ my Uncle's Family in Orange County,
met some guys from Mammoth and Colorado,
fished locally and not-so locally,
caught some nice fish,
rowed a drift boat, crashed a drift boat,
made my first appearance on the Trinity,
found some new waters to fish this year,
got laid countless times, brought my little girl Alani out for her first fishing trip,
hit the beaches of Fort Bragg and Huntington Beach,
trimmed my hair, got stuck in snow,
drove a Tundra pulling a 16" Clacka at 75 mph,
ate a bunch of really good food,
got a new cal king bed that is so comfy,
puked from drinking too much and eating a nasty burrito,
and worked the Scott Rods booth at the ISE Sac show.
It was quite an adventure. Drank and smoked a shit load and it was worth every minute that I wasn't sitting in class.
School starts for me on Tuesday. Lets hope for a strong semester and a good job!
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